Before:

After:


Okay Playboy. So by whatever devices, you have somehow scored yourself a Free, and you are King Coochie Cutter. With a Free on your arm, you now possess all the benefits and privileges of securing yourself a freshly glazed ham. You grin from ear to ear proudly as you trail behind her in her Meagan Good pants, you grin from ear to ear whenever you reach into your pocket for your house keys, and everyone in the neighborhood, men and women, want to whup your grinnin a$ for shinin on 'em wit sumthin so hott. Oh yeah, Free likes it when you rub her butt too. Life is sweet.

But some of us here at wedontgiveawhat.com know the 'enhancements' that commitment can add to the love of your life. The security of your unconditional love, all those dinners and ice cream, and your general sukka4luvness has added so much 'more' to your relationship.

Now the snitches over at bossip managed to catch Free slippin, but we're still gonna give Free a pass because she likes it when you rub her butt. Free was clearly in the club, and I'm figuring that the erosion of facepaint combined with enough shots of Patron are enough to knock off a few points off any girl. Yeah.

But this does beg the question, what happens to you when your shorty starts fallin off? You can't stop the rain from falling, but before all you saviors get all sukka4luv on us, think about what would happen if you suddenly started losing all your cake and she was sitting down discussing the issue with her girls. Please believe that your floppage would be placed under full review as well.

Anyways, be honest with us, what do you do? Tuff it out? Talk it out? Jumpoff? All three? We already know the answer, but we also know that you think that you do. So go ahead and enlighten us.